A Friday Funny (and Some Totally Wishful Thinking)

Ever wonder what happens when you take one of your kid’s books and tweak it into a nice little story about your ideal dream day?

Thanks to Laura Numeroff for her “If You Give a Cat a Cupcake” book as inspiration for this little fantasy, which I knocked out in 10 minutes flat.

Enjoy, and happy weekend, RMT’ers!

If You Give a Mom a Glass of Wine

If you give a mom a glass of wine,
she’ll ask for some chocolate to go with it.
When you give her the chocolate she might drop some on her shirt.
Trying to clean the spot will make her frustrated,
so she decides to go shopping for a new one at the mall.
She’ll want to go into Macy’s and Ann Taylor, too.
Then she’ll look for some shoes at Nordstroms.
She’ll find a few other things along the way as well.
She’ll stash it all into her reusable shopping bags, but once it’s too much to hold onto,
she goes back to her car and puts it all in the trunk.
All that shopping has made Mom thirsty, so she decides a nice iced latte would hit the spot,
and she heads over to Starbucks.
First she gets her drink,
but then a pack of Madelines looks nice, too.
She even picks up a new CD for the car ride home.
After Starbucks, the new music in the car motivates Mom to stop off for a manicure.
When she gets there, she sees the mani-pedi special and decides that’s a better deal than the mani alone.
(Mom knows a good deal when she sees one after all.)
Once that’s done and dry she gets back into the car,
where she decides to hit the grocery store on the way home for a few things.
There some nice cheese catches her eye,
so she asks the deli clerk for a good-sized wedge and picks up some crackers to pair with it.
Finally, Mom heads home, plunks down all her shopping finds, plates the cheese and crackers, settles in,
and pours herself another glass of wine from the open bottle from before.

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